Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
