i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
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How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
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My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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