whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
