And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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