I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Randomize
