i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
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