lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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