He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize