Don't make out with my wife yet
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
