I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
