what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
