Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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