..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
