conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
