I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
