New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
