ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
