is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
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