But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
That was before I lit my hair on fire
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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