I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
