What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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