Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Randomize
