I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
