Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
