So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
