The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
