I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Randomize
