i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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