she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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