So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
