I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
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