He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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