after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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