chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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