He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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