Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
worst night to have a conscience
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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