I didn't shave. On purpose
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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