Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
