Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Randomize