You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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