Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize