I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
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