At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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