Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
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Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
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What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
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