he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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