I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
