Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I think I just sharted jello shots
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
