omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
