You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
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