You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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