She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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